THE TRAP OF OFFENCE, ENVY AND ANGER

Offence is one of those small foxes that could easily spoil the vine. It is something that causes one to be hurt, angry, upset or stumble. Offence is actually something that outrages the moral or physical senses.

It distorts a sense of clear judgment and reality. The word offence comes from a Latin word, ‘Scandulum’, meaning stumbling block. In Greek it is the word, ‘Skandalon’, which means trap. The skandalon was like a box with an open lid and as soon as something got inside, it would slam shut and the thing trapped inside could not get out, no matter how much it tried. Its movement, will and desires were broken and it would either be pulled out and killed or it would die inside the skandalon.

Inside the Skandalon, it was dark; vision was impaired; possibly even breathing was difficult and there was a sense of desperation, helplessness, exasperation and despair. It is actually from these words, ‘Scandulum’ and ‘Skandalon’, where the English word ‘scandal’ comes from. Scandal means a disgraced action or conduct. When we embrace offence, our actions or conduct may cause outrage, reproach, or disgrace.

We ultimately become scandalous in our behaviour. It would actually follow that a scandal follows an offence, that is to say a position where a person has stumbled or been trapped. We must, therefore, learn how to deal with offence because it has the potential of trapping us into scandalous attitudes and behaviour, whereby causing our families, businesses and professional relationships to become sour.

What’s amazing about offence, envy and anger is that most of us struggle with it but are not honest enough to admit it. When we begin to feel like someone else’s success or prosperity has violated our assignment and purpose in life, we have just fallen in the diabolical trap of offence, envy and anger. We have actually stepped into the realm of competitive jealous, envy and foolishness.

When we become so insecure with who we are and with the gifts and talents God has bestowed upon us, that’s when we begin to view other people’s doing well as a loss to us and thereby begin to fall into the trap of offence, envy and anger. Unhealthy comparisons and competition is a recipe for chronic depression, misery and unhappiness.  

When we allow insecurity, offence, envy and anger to capture our hearts, emotions and mind, we have just given permission to the enemy of our souls to trap, limit and imprison our happiness and mobility in life. We do not have quality progress today in our families, society and nation because of our failure to deal with offence, envy, competitive jealousy and uncontrolled anger.

We sabotage each other’s success because of envy and competitive jealous. Envy is that internal pain we feel over someone else’s success or prosperity.

When we envy one another, we release dynamics that actually hinder or bind the progress of society and the nation at large. Envy has the power to obstruct progress in society. Envy is basically responsible for the attitude of self-interest, self-preservation and self-promotion. Envy and offence, when they are fully grown culminates in anger, then murder. Whenever we feel hurt or offended over another’s success, envy has us in its diabolically murderous claws. We must learn to deal with offence and envy; if we don’t, we will continue killing each other’s dreams and visions.

We must learn how to embrace our true identity, so that we are grounded and perfected in love. It is difficult for the seeds of offence, envy and anger to flourish in the heart of the person fully established in his or her identity and in the love of God. Envy promotes self, while love will always campaign for the advancement of another.

Jesus said in Mark 12:30, 31, “And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind and with all your strength.’ This is the first commandment. And the second, like it, is this: ‘you shall love your neighbour as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.”

Walking in love and forgiveness is essential to dealing with offence, envy and anger. It is easy to revenge compared to walking in love and forgiveness. Remember, to get even you also inevitably make yourself even with your ‘enemy’. You actually bring yourself down to his or her level and even below by your conduct.

To forgive someone who has hurt and offended you is costly but the best thing you could ever do. Myron Augsburger said, “to forgive is costly. To forgive is to carry one’s own wrath on the sin of another; the guilty one is released, the offended one frees him, by bearing his own indignation and resolving it in love.” When we learn how to surrender our right to hurt back those who have hurt us, we will be free to be ourselves and progress freely in life and thereby become quality instruments for family, community and national progress and development.

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