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IN LAND OF THE BLIND, THE ONE-EYED IS KING

28/07/2020 06:32:00 BY Lwazi's Pandora's Boxs

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My dearest readers ...

Only a tone-deaf simpleton with a slab of concrete where his brain is supposed to be will have missed the fact that the Premier League of Eswatini (PLE) is supposed to go to the polls on August 8 to elect a new chairman and an executive committee.
On Friday, I had a chat with one football administrator, whose views I take seriously because he is not only learned, has a sharp wit and politically inclined but he is a breath of fresh air in his area of work and he made a poignant observation about the PLE elections.

“The biggest problem we have is that those that are available are not capable. Those that are capable are not available.”
Classic quotable quote!

This reminded me of the story of how many people over the millennia have cast aspersions on the biblical Moses’s navigation skills for taking the Children of Israel on a meandering, 40-year-long journey. And mind you, those questioning this, are just decent, kind folks. The most vicious among us have downright ridiculed Moses and the hundreds of thousands who followed him going around in circles. Some point that a snail could cover the longest route from Egypt to Jerusalem in about 10 years. And we’re not even talking about a snail with a gym membership here!

For starters, we don’t even know which route the quintessential short-tempered bearded one took. He couldn’t have had a useful map. Besides I can’t imagine that it’s easy to negotiate one’s way in a robe and sandals without spandex tights. Also, we don’t even know how long Moses had to wait for his wife Zipporah while she tried on different outfits every morning. So hands off, Moses, please!

story

The Moses story speaks to me this Tuesday morning in the context of the PLE elections because we surely need a modern day Moses to take our football out of the financial bondage it is entangled in since it lost its charming leader, the dearly departed Victor ‘Maradona’ Gamedze, gunned down by a bumbling fool - with no regard for life - on the fateful evening of January 14, 2018 at exactly 6:53pm.

Since that fateful day, we have retrogressed on all fronts. A PLE chairmanship hopeful nicely coined it to me the other day saying, “That man who shot Gamedze literally shot football!” I couldn’t have put it better myself. You only have to look at the names being bandied about as possible candidates for both the chairmanship and the executive committee to understand we have such a limited choice of individuals, we are literally scraping the bottom of a barrel. In fact, looking at some of the names, you get the sense that here are bald-headed men fighting over a comb! Heek, heek, heek….you can laugh here, you son of a gun. Thank you very much.

Here is the reason why. We cannot find another Gamedze in our midst; a man with the business acumen, political connections and aura to turn our lemons into lemonade so that we can all drink from his well. We have to make peace with the fact that we don’t have that kind of leader right now. But we need someone who can steady the ship, which was on the fast lane to hitting the iceberg. The fact that some sponsors are now renewing their contracts with football on a yearly basis shows lack of confidence on the current leadership. Now we have the coronavirus obstacle which has caused irreparably damage. We need a leader who will make lemon cider from the lemons COVID-19 has served us.
We need someone who will be able to convince the existing sponsors, MTN Eswatini, Eswatini Bank, Eswatini Posts and Telecommunications Corporation (EPTC) and Sincephetelo Motor Vehicle Accident Fund (SMVAF) why it still makes business sense to associate with football even during this COVID-19 pandemic era.

road map

Someone who can give a clear and concise road map on how football will be able to exist in an era where there is likelihood that fans won’t be there to fill the stadiums and create a carnival atmosphere. An era where digital marketing is no longer an option but a MUST and one which needs the leadership to think outside the box.
Whosever should be PLE chairman must be someone who will be willing to bite the bullet; put in place the structures in that PLE office, hire an independent CEO - not a lapdog of the executive committee, have a vision for the organisation and what he intends to achieve. We have been trudging somewhere in the middle of nowhere, for far too long. We have been in the forest yet inexplicably we can’t see the trees, for a long time now. Do we seriously have that individual in those whose names are being bandied about? Can we seriously hope things will change for the better if any of those nominated take over?
Therein lies the rub.

The incumbent Peter ‘Touch’ Magagula is seeking re-election and my green flies on the PLE wall tell me he has already been nominated by 20 of the 26 member teams. If numbers are anything to go by, that is a vote of confidence for him. But nomination and the actually voting are two different things.
Elections history dictates that until the votes have been cast, you cannot be assured of anything. People may nominate you but then not vote for you. It is possible. Look at the USA today where Donald Duck ... er Donald Trump is making a mess of the country.

‘Touch’, again, polarises opinion. Some, like Callies Chairman Ngudze, feel he is better the ‘devil’ you know than the ‘angel’ you don’t know. Others believe, he is not capable to lead the organisation to greater heights because he is always under the beck and call of the mother body, Eswatini Football Association (EFA). Then you have a former Chairman in Mark Carmichael, an executive member in Sicelo Mkhonta, firebrand Charles Matsebula and some ‘independent candidates’ hopefuls in the bulldozing Mashumi Shongwe and flamboyant Bongani ‘Under Control’ Mamba.

power

Interesting, if you may ask me!
In the end, it is teams who will cast the votes and they have the power to do so. It is that constitutional power they need to exercise with caution. Our football is teetering on a knife-edge and the COVID-19 pandemic has made things worse for football. A more feasible and proper plan is needed going forward in the COVID-19 pandemic era. How will the person who takes over the leadership role ensure our teams survive? How will he juggle the interests of the sponsors and the situation on the ground?
This will be akin to being asked to play violin by urinating on it! A dreadful task!

We should be feeling sorry for whosoever is willing to take the baton because this is not an easy task. If anything it is akin to a ‘kiss of death’, as it were.
It needs someone who will understand this is a new ‘normal’ environment; someone who will be willing to dance with the lions in the jungle and someone who understands the football eco-system. Someone who will understand that, as the boss of bosses, Dr Irvin ‘Iron Duke’ Khoza is wont to say, ‘you cannot dry today’s washing with yesterday’s sun.”

As it is, dear reader, true to my friend’s brilliant observation, the available ones are not capable, the capable ones are not available. With that in mind then certain, in the land of the blind in the Premier League of Eswatini (PLE), the one-eyed will be the KING!