Polygamy is an idea by the devil-Fakudze
MBABANE – Reverend Kaiser Fakudze of the Metropolitan Church has described polygamy as an idea brought to men by the devil
Reverend Fakudze shared this during a sermon aired on radio last weekend.
When called on Wednesday to shed more light on his sermon, he said the reason why there was unrest in some polygamous marriages was because the man failed to communicate with the creator of polygamy on its consequences and how to better handle the marriage.
"God created one wife for one man and he has answers to all questions regarding that. The devil brought in the idea of many wives but did not provide solutions to problems emanating from this arrangement," Fakudze said.
He said when God crafted marriage, He pulled out one rib from a man and out of it made one woman for that man.
"Polygamy is an idea of the devil and the worst thing about it is that when a man heeds to this idea he does not ask the devil what will become of the situation or how he should handle it, hence the consequences," he said.
The man of the cloth said when the devil introduces the idea to a man he singles out certain loopholes and brings the issue of marrying another wife as a solution, without delving into the repercussions.
Fakudze said marrying more than one wife at the same time was a result of being unsatisfied.
"It started in the Bible with Elkanah and it is also proven that there is no peace in a polygamous family. In the olden days Hannah was in a polygamous family where her rival Penninah would mock and laugh at her because she was barren," he said.
Fakudze said men who married many wives were not in line with the dictates of the Bible, but mentioned that if they repent while in that situation, they have to continue with their wives.
The reverend said all people who were created by God were expected to do His will, regardless of the status they have on earth.
"Even people who are princes here on earth will be treated the same way as ordinary people when we get to Heaven, the earthly titles will remain here," he said. Reverend Johannes Mazibuko of the Mbabane Alliance Church said men who are married to many wives at the same time are deprived of certain things in the church. "They may not be assigned to leadership positions because they cannot be exemplary to the church," he said. He said, however, if a polygamist repents there is no way he could be made to abandon the other wives.
"We only advise him to treat the wives equally," he said.
Polygamy is a luxury – Chief Nzameya
MBABANE - Traditionalist and appointed MP Chief Nzameya Nhlabatsi said marrying many wives was just a luxury.
He said, "Ordinary men who marry many wives are doing so just for the fun of it and not because they are desperate."
He said there are very few cases whereby there is a need for a man to continue marrying other wives.
Nhlabatsi, however, said it was a different case for chiefs because they had to marry many wives if they wanted to serve their communities fairly.
He said the wives have different qualities that may enhance their attempt to cater for all types of people in the chiefdom.
"You may find that one wife is generous and the other is not yet there are all sorts of people, even needy ones who will come to the umphakatsi to seek help," he said.
‘First wife is the boss’
MBABANE – Women who marry into a polygamous relationships leave their fate in the hands of the first wife as she is the one who determines if she is willing to allow them time with the husband or not.
Reverend Kaiser Fakudze said the other wives should know that the husband has been lent to them because ‘he was already somebody else’s when you came so you cannot claim that he is yours’.
Fakudze said the Bible states that God took out one rib from a man’s chest and made one woman out of it.
Several other pastors including Human Rights and Gender Specialist Doo Aphane shared the same sentiments in an interview early in the week.
Aphane said wives will never be equal in a polygamous family.
"Polygamy on its own is the source of inequality. In siSwati the wife’s origin also determines whether she is senior than the rest of the wives regardless of when she was married," she said.
The human rights and gender activist also mentioned that the Constitution also brought conflict regarding this as it also defines lovers who have lived together for a long time as fit to assume the status of husband and wife.
culture
Reverend Grace Masilela of the Church of the Nazarene said even in Swazi culture, the first wife is the most recognised.
She said, "That is why the family pays lobola on behalf of the husband for the first wife and leave the rest to him if he decides to continue marrying other wives."
Masilela said Swazi culture dictates that if a husband dies while at another wife’s home other than the first wife, his coffin is taken out of the mourning house through the side of the house and not through the door because it is said that he died while he was away from his home.
She said the culture honours this even when the wife has died or has left her marital home.
Also to reiterate these words was Reverend Johannes Mazibuko of the Mbabane Alliance Church.
He said the three main things that constitute a marriage are relationship, status and inheritance.
Mazibuko said although the relationship may be the same with all the wives, the status and inheritance will not be the same.
"In siSwati the first wife is recognised and given a high status. Even when there is a family function where all wives gather, the senior one is usually given the responsibility to carry out dishing for the whole family," he said.
He said the second and other wives are not entrusted with crucial responsibilities such as that of dishing food for senior family members.
COMMENTS:
- I disagree with the Reverend. Polygamy is not a product of the devil but rather a form of marriage which has served many purposes within the societies where it existed. I wll give an example of a man who marries a woman who cannot bear children in a society where the primary purpose of marriage is procreation. He will not divorce the first wife like many evil Christians do nowadays but will simply marry another wife whose purpose is to aid in child bearing. In such circumstances the second wife can even give the first wife some of her children to aid in child rearing - Kumfaka esinyeni. There are other reasons why a man would marry more than one woman. It is unfortunate that the journalist did not ask knowledgable people on this subject, prefering to ask some ignorant chiefs - many chiefs know very little. Having said that, one must admit that many men these days get into polygamy for lust and women marry into it for material comfort. The original Swazi principles behind marriage have been eroded by Western influences and Christianity. I wish to give credit to Mr Dube from Tambothi for enlightening me on the institution of marriage within Swazi society. Further credit goes to Dr Amos Wilson (A man all Africans shoul read/listen to) for his analysis on the institution of marriage and how it serves society.
November 10, 2012, 11:00 am, Thandaza Ncukumbili Silolo
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