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Sally called when she got the word.
She said: “I suppose you’ve heard -
About Alice”
Well I rushed to the window
And I looked outside
But I could hardly believe my eyes -
As a big limousine rolled up
Into Alice’s drive...

Oh, I don’t know why she’s leaving
Or where she’s gonna go
I guess she’s got her reasons
But I just don’t want to know
‘Cos for twenty-four years
I’ve been living next door to Alice

Twenty-four years just waiting for a chance To tell her how I’m feeling, maybe get a second glance
Now I’ve got to get used to not living next door to Alice...

Wololoma ... sangena Gazi singena with our all-time favourite song, ‘Living next door to Alice’ by Smokie Robinson, which was produced by Mike Chapman and Nicki Chinn. We will tell you more shortly how this song was re-lived by recent events in one of the camps of an armed forces side ngalaku-Matsapha. For now nje, let’s take a minute of silence and mourn the sheepish manner all our African representatives bombed out of the 2018 FIFA World Cup.

Kubuhlungu vele Gazi. Others have already said vele le-Africa is not just called a dark continent by mistake because kumnyama vele. One crew member even joked kutsi lo-FIFA yena nje umeleni. Football Is not For Africa (FIFA). Gegegegege ... Gazi, it’s a busy weekend Gazi – not just on the sporting circles but nangalaka-Entertainment where kuphekwe ngagalaza.

Gazi phela it’s the Hipnotik, kunabo Joyous Celebrations, so vele whether it’s freezing cold as it has been the whole week or not, you have every reason to go out and enjoy.

Talking of going out, this armed forces side defender has found that doing so very often can have so much destabilising effect and cause you so much stress that no medication can help.

Phela this defender is nursing a heartache...uyopha Gazi. While he has been going out to enjoy his favourite waters of immortality le-canteen a former player of his team has been enjoying stolen moments with his live-in-lover, sisho lomasihlalisane wakhe lo-bhuti. The secret affair Gazi has been ongoing for two months now.

Each time the former player realised the defender was in camp for the next day’s match, he would invite lo-Sisi next door for some rigorous bedroom aerobics aphindze abuyele in the defender’s flat. This happened Gazi until one of the defender’s friends who doesn’t reside in camp came through kuto-checker his friend, only to see lo-Sisi coming out of the former player’s flat.

When he confronted her, she mumbled some inaudible words wangavakala kutsi utsini. The friend then phoned his friend and told him what he had seen.

The cat was finally out of the bag when the defender confronted his girlfriend who confessed to the affair. While the former player continues to deny anything, insisting the lady had come to borrow some DVD’s (we suspect one of the movie must have been titled ‘Stolen Moments’), the signs are clear that this has been a secret affair that has been ongoing for some time. The defender has reported the matter to baphatsi who have called the ex-player for questioning but no decision has been taken yet.

Our informed sources le-camp have told us that there is likelihood the defender will be transferred to another workstation. Eyi Gazi, we feel for the defender especially as he had a brilliant season for his team last season and we were hoping nje in the forthcoming season he will be one of the players to watch.

We want to advice him kutsi, like his friends have told him, he must just dump the cheater because if she cheats once, she will cheat again.
Meantime, he can play Smokie Robinson’s all time hit, ‘LIVING NEXT DOOR TO ALICE on full blast ... klikliklikliklikli

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