FA CANNOT WASH A WHITE SHIRT WITH DIRTY HANDS

My dearest readers ... After the recent national team, Sihlangu Semnikati’s comatose performance in the COSAFA Castle Cup, I told a friend of mine, who I could point out in a public identification parade for a con man, that the nation’s former pride reminded me of a joke once told by my favourite comedian Trevor Noah about Bafana Bafana.

I will paraphrase it here in today’s State-of-the-Nation-Sports-Address (SONSA). During a divorce case, the presiding judge had to make a judgment on who will take custody of the couple’s only baby boy. He opted to find out from the teary-eyed boy who he would be comfortable to stay with. JUDGE: Okay my boy, you will stay with your father from now onwards? BOY: No, he doesn’t stay at home, comes back punch-drunk every night and beats me up for no reason. JUDGE: Okay, so I will let you stay with your mum then. Is that fine with you? BOY: No, she beats me up too whenever she comes back from work upset! JUDGE: So then, who do you want to stay with? BOY: Give me Sihlangu, they never beat anyone!

You can laugh here. Klikliklikliklikliklikliklikliklikliklikli ... The national team, Sihlangu’s poor performance aside, it is the chaos that has reigned supreme at the Women’s Football Association (WFA) for months now, leading to the national league being called off, that has my oval-shaped stomach in knots. Those not blessed with tea-bag memories will recall that I now sound like a stuck record on this issue which has reached the cul-de-sac. I knew it would come to this. It was never going to resolve itself. The stubbornness of the National Football Association of Swaziland (NFAS) and propensity to try and sweep everything under the carpet was not going to resolve this impasse. The NFAS predilection to defend one of their own at all costs has been laid bare, much to the expense of women’s football.

Unlike the NFAS, I will not skirt around the issue. I will confront the elephant in the room. The six disgruntled teams are upset about many issues, chief being the election of the current executive committee led by Sonnyboy Mabuza. They have resolved to boycott the national league. They have gone as far as writing to the world international football governing body, FIFA. The FA has been steadfast in telling them it’s either they accept the status quo or life will continue without them. It almost made a helluva of a mess to a good gesture by SwaziBank, who forked out E75 000 for the maiden Women’s Cup. It needed a quick intervention of some sober-minded football administrators to prevent what would have been a very embarrassing scenario. The six disgruntled teams took part in the Women’s Cup as sanity prevailed. But still the league, with only six teams, was played in shocking circumstances where some teams had no playing cards, fixtures changed at whim and professionalism a swear word.

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