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IT’S THEIR LOSS

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Sir,


Every relationship has three distinct parts: me, you and us. But when you’re dating someone new and amazing, it’s easy to get sucked into having fun that you drop your beloved me-time or act salty when your partner wants a day or two alone. It’s a tricky balancing act, especially for millennials who are spending more years being single and cherishing their #DoNotDisturb moments than any other generation.


Who needs an army when you have your girls to back you up for anything and everything? You don’t need to call them when you’re down because they knock at your door, ready to cry, laugh, get mad and get crazy with you all night.


You understand that life is a battlefield, but you have to be the last woman standing, in heels with your lipstick, blow-dried hair and freshly polished nails. You shop your heart out, indulge in a classy bottle of wine, have a day-long pamper sesh, explore the world and shop some more.

You’re willing to spend on expensive yoga classes not just for your body’s wellness, but also for the fun chikahan sesh with your friends after sweating it out. You do whatever makes you happy, because you want it and you deserve it. But when one of your girls is down and blue, you’re ready to go the extra mile to cheer her up.


You are anything but a gold-digger because you know you can provide for what you, and the people you love most, need. You want a man who will accept you for who you are, not a man who will sweep you off your feet with his money.


Remember when you were a child? Having fun was a very big part of your day. You did not think twice about the fact that today was a new day and you were going to enjoy it in some way or other! Yet as adults it would seem that we view having fun differently.
 In our overcrowded lives, we have forgotten how to have fun.


We get drawn into our work, family, television and any other activity that crowds our already overcrowded life, that having fun is perceived as not being possible or allowed! We get caught up with what’s just ahead of us, or we become fixated to what has just passed that we leave no room to take time to enjoy where we are right now!


It is very easy to let your radar slip into a negative mindset. One way to know if you have, is if you find yourself more often than not zoning into all that is wrong that you fail to see or acknowledge all the many things that are going right in your life.


The fact is everyone enjoys having fun; I for one do not know of anyone who dislikes fun! So how often do you wake up and ask yourself, what can I do today to have some fun? This is a similar question that I asked myself recently. It became clear to me that bringing the fun factor into my life for 2018 was to be one of my key priorities. And fun I intend to have!


Life can be high pressured, unpredictable, challenging and stressful; but guess what the best stress reliever of all is? Having fun!
And worth remembering is that we don’t stop having fun because we grow old but we grow old because we stop having fun! What you must decide today is how you want your life to be. Be alive or be fearful, only you can change.


You don’t need to wait for the right man to come along, you find him. If a date fails, move onto the next. Who cares if you’ve dated a lot of guys? There’s plenty of fish in the sea; don’t be limited to what you’ve caught. If you don’t like it, throw it back, so both of you can swim and explore some more.
Every day is a celebration of your independence. You are proud of your strong personality and most of all, you are proud of who you are. If men can’t handle someone like you, it’s their loss, not yours.


Nkosingphile Ntshalintshali

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