Times Of Swaziland: USE SILENCE TO CHECK YOURSELF BEFORE…

USE SILENCE TO CHECK YOURSELF BEFORE…
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Editor on 28/12/2022 12:24:00


Sir,
Sometimes we see the unexpected, but we notice everything in reaction. The turn
off for our mind doesn’t mean we can’t see the energy put to suppress
emotions bounce back with equal reaction. The sorrow I try to escape from will
come back and hurt me more, for every action there is an equal and opposite
reaction. I walked down the street, stopped at the corner and waited for the
light to change. As I did, I watched the trees blow in the wind. I looked up at
the sky and saw the clouds hanging low. I inhaled and closed my eyes. A couple
of seconds of nothing and then, ‘watch it’ some guy said, shouting at me
with a look.
React
About to react, I stopped myself from saying anything. Instead I noted that
maybe the street corner wasn’t the best place to experience a moment of
silence. But then again, when is? In our overscheduled lives, how often do we
get the time to not only be silent but to also experience it around us? I used
to be uncomfortable with silence. I was so terrified to be alone with my
thoughts, or not have something to say in a conversation that I’d fill empty
spaces with chatter. But I began to wonder; what could my life become if I
talked less and sat in silence more? What started out as a weekend experiment
has turned into a life practice. When the mind quits, the heart opens. Silence
leads us to trust our own experience, to find a new way of seeing and to find a
place of clarity where we aren’t controlled by distractions.
Attention
As mentioned before, I used to talk a lot. Much of the time I didn’t pay
attention to what I was saying or why. Little did I know that what was coming
out of my mouth was not only hurting my self-confidence but also reinforcing my
lack of belief in myself. I would talk over people if I wanted to be heard, take
most things personally, react quickly, make excuses for my actions and talk
about others in a judgmental and critical tone. The lower our self-esteem, the
more muddy, evasive and inappropriate our communication is likely to be because
of uncertainty about our own thoughts and feelings, as well as anxiety about the
listener’s response.
Concern
With all that we have going on day-to-day we are often the last concern in our
minds. Taking time out each day to just settle down in silence, maybe even just
being aware of the body’s natural rhythm of breathing, cools down the
emotional centre of the brain and brings the ability to regulate our emotions
and be more in control of our impulses. Adding silence to our lives lets us get
in touch with how we’re feeling, giving us time to see what we need more of
and what we need to let go of, creating a sense of balance. Use silence to check
yourself before you make decisions to begin acting intentionally and from a
place of empowerment, rather than allowing circumstances and what others desire
push you from one thing to another.