WHY I DON’T ATTEND BRIDAL SHOWERS

I’ve probably been to one bridal party of the four I have been invited to and it’s not because I’m a hater or I’m unsupportive it’s because you people are charging us entrance fees for bridal showers and my coins and sensibilities do not sway in that direction.

Will there be security and valet parking because what is truly going on girl?

So I have always maintained that I will have a bridal shower budget in my wedding preparations, well by ‘always’ I mean as recently as the first time I realised people are handling these things with the same intensity of a club promoter. I’m just trying to come through to support the bride, play some ridiculous games, be inappropriate and give shady but sincere advice. Therefore I don’t understand why that should cost me north of E800.

I’ll break down the cost, stick with me.

You receive an invitation, probably on WhatsApp, and you go through it and as you peruse there are requirements of you as an invited guest – your presence alone is not enough. There is a dress code “please wear denim and florals ladies!” your mind rapidly goes through the contents of your wardrobe and you grimace as you realise you don’t own a pair of denim anything that will do in someone’s bridal party photographs. So you make a mental note to purchase some, you need some new jeans anyway.

Then just before you return to the invitation you remember that the only florals in your wardrobe are on a bomber jacket and you know very well that is not the look they are going for – they want everyone to look soft and feminine not like bikers in touch with their feelings. You’re basically sulking now as you realise you have to go find a nice enough floral shirt to pair with your new jeans.
You take a deep sigh and return your attention to your invitation where you are all encouraged to bring a gift for the bride. You wonder if buying a gift now means you do not have to bring one to the wedding but you stop yourself because you realise you’re being extreme and that if you go to Clicks you could probably find two gifts to present at each occasion. But then you see the bride has a gift store registry, again just gentle encouragement of where you can purchase gifts, and Clicks is not on it!
So now you mentally go through Mr Price Home’s offerings and you’re stumped, what use is a E40 planter to a newly married couple? Your money is already stretched kind of thin and you haven’t even finished reading the invitation. When you return to it you see that there is also a kind request for contributions of E250 per person. Oh and the location is somewhere you need to get into a car and drive to for no less than E30 minutes.
It’s just a lot and I really believe there is a way to celebrate a friend getting married without imposing all of these monies on the invited guests. You don’t know what people are going through financially and it’s not okay to have them feeling like they let you down because they could not afford to be there. 
There is also the other school of thought which insists that the bridal party is your friends’ gift to you and that is why it costs money. I mean I get that but must it be so much money?
Sinjalo nje sisetotfungisa emaoutfit emishado  and girl my coins are feeling oppressed. It’s interesting to have seen bridal parties morph from being intimate, fun, low-key affairs that celebrate the betrothed to splashy, fun, opposite of low-key affairs. I’m not even miserly like that but my coins truly are not in a position to show up in that gallant a manner.
I’m not the authority on these matters, I’m just someone who is tired of coming up with fake commitments to not attend the bridal showers of people I care about because my coins won’t stack high enough. I don’t know maybe I have some valid points or maybe I’m just cheap.
I think it’s the valid points though.

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